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Waffle Goon
Spiderwaffle
Are those...bite marks?
Vital statistics
Type Robot
Effects Distracting Gil, stolen information
Source Sergeant Volt
Location Voulge
Cost to buy Not for buying!
Cost to sell Not for selling!



Waffle Goon is one of the Mecha Goons. Its main purpose is to keep Aviator G distracted, and away from Mecha Baron and Sergeant Volt. It is very effective at this -- because it's a mechanical waffle. Also, it can do espionage.

Aviator G has actually tried to eat Waffle Goon before. Hence, the bite marks.

Description[]

Background[]

Mecha Baron and Sergeant Volt were sitting at a table, discussing plans for their next offer.


Volt: I think it's a good offer to help XeXeXe, but he's too involved with THAT STINKING KERBPUFF! ARGHHHHH!


Mecha Baron: I see. But don't you think their relationship is more-


Gil: LISTENING IS FUN!


Volt: Gil?!? What're you doing here?!?


Gil: Listening! It warms my heart to impolitely eavesdrop on important discussions!


Mecha Baron: Gil, can you please leave us alone? We're discussing business.


Gil: Hungryyyyyy... I DEMAND WAFFLES!


Volt: GET OUT OF HERE!!


Mecha Baron: Great, now he's never gonna leave.


Gil: IS THERE AN ARTICLE TO BACK UP YOUR COMMAND?!?


Volt: YES THERE IS! You're annoying, this is OUR conference, and I want you to go away!


Gil crossed his arms and scowled (though he has no mouth).


"Your citations are clearly broken! I DEMAND WAFFLES!"


Mecha Baron sighed, and agreed to give Gil a waffle.


He grabbed a waffle and hurled it down the hallway. Gil gave a shriek of pleasure and bounded after it.


Volt: Finally, he's gone. Now what about-


He was interrupted by Gil, who had just come back through the hallway, his mouth covered in O-Berry syrup.


Gil: I DEMAND MORE WAFFLES!


Mecha Baron and Volt: NO!


Gil: NO ONE KEEPS WAFFLES FROM THE GREAT GIL! HAND THE PASTRIES OVER AND NO ONE GETS INCAPACITATED!


Volt nervously backed away as Gil glared at him.


Three Very Miserable Hours Later


Gil had finally fallen asleep, after eating OVER 9000 waffles. Sergeant Volt and Mecha Baron were not happy.


Volt: I wish there was some way to GET RID OF HIM!


Mecha Baron: Are you kidding? He's the best butler I've ever had.


Volt: But he's so ANNOYING!


Mecha Baron: You are right... now only if we could get those waffles to keep distracting him AWAY from here.


Volt: I've got it! We can make a robotic waffle that looks and smells like the real thing to keep Gil away from here!


Mecha Baron: Brilliant! I'll build it myself.


Volt: I get to program it, right?


Mecha Baron: Of course, old friend.


Fin


Aftermath[]

And so, Waffle Goon was created. After that, Volt added some modifications, and it can now camouflage and do spying for the crew. After all, who expects a waffle with bite marks to spy on them?

Trivia[]

  • It has Aviator G's teeth marks on it. Seriously.
    • More proof that he's crazy.
  • Waffle Goon even SMELLS like a waffle. Seriously. It emits odors that emulate a waffle's crisp, rich scent, which makes Gil thinks it's a waffle all the more.
  • Waffle Goon gathers most of the Mecha Goons' intelligence. It hasn't been caught yet.

Internal Links[]

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