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TurtleShroom (Penguin) Jones
TurtleShroom (penguin) image
King or kook? You decide.
BornTurtleShroom Jones
June 27th, 1968
Mattress Village, Olde Antarctica (now Trans-Antarctica, USA)
ResidenceThe Imperial Semi-Democratic Depositic Theocratic Palace, Clubb Phengin Weekee.
NationalityAntarctic
Other namesTS, TSP
EthnicityEmperor penguin
CitizenshipAntarctic
EducationSelf-taught
OccupationDictator
Years active2005-2009
EmployerClubb Phenguin Weekee
Home townMattress Village
SalaryUnknown
Net worthHe refuses to share
Height4 feet
Weight97 lb. (without crown)
Known forHis leadership, wealth, power, influence, appearance, actions, and overall strange behavior
TitleWebmaster, Absoulte Energie, der gefürchtete Schildkröte-Pilz, Diktator der Penguin-Enzyklopädie
Term2005-2007, 2008-2009
PredecessorSaint V-Rex, Saint Robbsi
SuccessorHat Pop, Comrade Tigernose
Political partyWebmasterism
Opponent(s)Socialists/Communists/Stipedcatsnout Hall
Board member ofthe BOSS (as BOSSMASTER)
Spouse(s)N/A
PartnerSaint Barkjon
ParentsMister and Mrs. Jones (real names unknown)
RelativesMobileShroom,
Hermeshroom,
Roslyn,
Tortugadesetas,
Crazy Uncle Ivan,
Tammyshroom
Call-sign"Man of God" (used by bodyguards)
AwardsUncountable
Signature
Turtleshroomsignature


"TSP" redirects here. For the puffle, see TurtleShroom (puffle).
For the shocking future of this penguin, see TSP/Future.
For the epic theme sung by TSP's comrades friends, see TSP/The Turtlenator March.
For the alleged amusement park conspiracies surrounding this villain, please see Holyberden and Puff_Flags#Secrets.

The Absoulte Energie, der gefürchtete Schildkröte-Pilz, Diktator der Penguin-Enzyklopädie, or as he is known in English, Dictator TurtleShroom (penguin) Jones, TurtleShroom, or merely TSP, was the leader and final successor in an ancient dynasty of ruling elite on the Clubb Phengin Weekee. He resigned from office but is notorious for returning to the whiteboards as a Backseat Driver.

Most, if not all, creatures consider him extremely annoying, and his many siblings also create chaos in the world. He is the purest and most honest of his siblings.

Background[]

Early Life[]

Hatched to a loving family back in the days of Olde Antarctica in Mattress Village, around forty-eight years ago, TurtleShroom (the penguin) was sheltered heavily. Unlike most creatures, he was unaware of the filth and inappropriate things of his world, like instability, liars, deceivers, butter-uppers, villains, and even the Revolutions and such of his time.

He was taught dying principles on things such as "Stability is Paramount", "stand for what is right", "Censorship", as well as "honesty", "integrity", "dignity", and "cleanliness".

He developed this weird obsession with crosses as a chick, a love of which even Mayor McFlapp can not understand.

When he was sixteen, TSP set out on his own, carrying with him his ethical beliefs and an unfortunate trust of everyone, something that would be a problem down the road.


On his own[]

TurtleShroom (penguin) carried on in life and developed a long-standing love of computers. He held various jobs as an IT-technician, computer tech supporter, and even as a roller coaster maintenance penguin as a side-job. It was at his theme park job that he discovered a flier for what would one day be his empire, the Clubb Phengin Weekee. The flier explained the concept of the wiki and its location, one that peaked TSP's interest and sent him running with all he could carry in his player card.


Early Weekee career[]

TSP arrived at the Weekee around March 2007, back when it was a lobby and four entrances to the maze of whiteboards. There were no major user pages, no houses in portals, and all articles were simply text and a few portraits. TSP got to work and helped on the site for ages. He was promoted to Sysop by the Weekee's founder, Saint Virrex, and later to Bureaucrat. Sadly, though, St. Virrex left because he felt he outgrew the Weekee, waddling off and never being heard from again. TSP and his close friends, Saint Robbsi and Barkjon, among many others marched on, and the site continued to grow. Penguins such as Sk8rbluscat and Happyface jumped on board, and prosperity followed.


However, TSP, in a strange display of generosity, bestowed great and bureaucratic power to a resident named Aqua Jet because she was a routine target for Fords when not at the Weekee. This caused unrest and bitter complaints on the site for months to come. TSP has still found graffiti mentioning Aqua Jet and condemning the action.


St. Robbsi chose to symbolically leave exactly one year after he joined, and he promoted Barkjon to rank of Co-Webmaster and TurtleShroom (penguin) to Co-Webmaster as well. The two penguins were very similar in beliefs, and they prospered together.


It was then that a close friend of TSP, Simon Wiki, informed the leader that security was needed and that a resident genius, Beaky4444, had created as PSA branch specifically for site affairs, a branch dubbed Project: Top Agent.


The adventures on that thing were glorious, the characters absurd! The Weekee's squad once sent Herbert to Mars, and stopped a wizard from stealing ham! Wanted posters were stapled onto nearly every whiteboard on the land, and everyone great and small got involved! It was in this time that Captain Str00del migrated to the USA, and that F was declassified. Doctrines were drafted on how to handle vandals, and these were used on legendary spammers like Sanity1 and Sp00nzoid, banishing them.


However, Top Agent became out of hand. TSP had written a complex set of laws (far more confusing than the COC) banning things like Demon Penguin supporters (they exist) and freaks from being members of the group. Security went overboard, and contributors suspected contributors, monitoring their every move on the walls, scanning every scrawl, marking every monologue, processing every penciling. TSP was forced, much to his sadness and to the site's, to cancel Top Agent forever. Unfortunately, he 'forgot' to head on to the special rooms where the rules are kept and erase the "no magic" laws and other things from the TA era.

This proved a problem. Coupled with the secret anger of promotions and the absurd laws, lots of protests began. He grew angry and began banning protesters left right and center using a large and complex behemoth machine TSP had been operating for over a year (this was pre-deletion rod).


This further split the site as twelve Demon Penguins stormed the weekee, and posting how great it was to be a Demon Penguin. They attacked TSP immediately. A banning spree followed, insults and sock puppets flew left and right. The Demon Penguins were enraged and mocked TSP, calling him a "dictator". They began calling TurtleShroom (penguin)'s government a semi-democratic theocratic despository. TSP, in an attempt to show the Demon Penguins that he was not scared, took the title of "Dictator" and christened his now infamous German title, "Absoulte Energie, der gefürchtete Schildkröte-Pilz, Diktator der Penguin-Enzyklopädie".


After the Demon Penguins were cast out, the population continued to exhibit unrest because of the careless promotions performed in the past. TSP, in guilt, signed what is now called the Magna Carta, a still-unpublished document stating that he could not promote anyone unless it's a critical emergency, and that even he, as the ruler, must follow the laws established. No-one anticipated this, as he was often viewed as "above the law".

Dictatorial era[]

As Dictator, TSP faced controversy on his title, and explained it again and again to haters, also appointing Barkjon as the superior to any of his orders or ideals.

TSP watched the Weekee grow in this period, he had engineered and empire with the help of a lot of friends, writers, and other users in power. The Weekee was now three times larger than it was when TSP joined.

Snakesy1 entered the whiteboards shortly after TSP's dictatorial proclamation, and rose to Bureaucrat status in the Weekee. A now famous Str00del, Chlorine, performed minor vandalism, erasing whiteboards and such. He was one of the earliest Str00dels to come into existence and the first victim of TSP's Deletion Rod, a portable scepter that could eradicate the banned from the Weekee forever. It was much easier than the contraption he used on before.


It was also in his early reign that Ben reared his ugly beak, turning TSP's ethical beliefs into weapons with his infamous faking of innocence and sorrow. Appealing to TSP's love of crosses one day before his favorite holiday (Easter Sunday), he managed to spare himself from being banned despite the huge stacks of evidence by hiring the Dictator as a puppet-lawyer, who fought to the end to save him. Ben later revealed to his cronies in a wiretapped chatroom that he had "buttered [TurtleShroom (penguin)] up", meaning Ben had tricked him into feeling sorry for his cause when in reality, he was pure evil.


However, one of TSP's old friends, Snowman 1001, was facing catastrophe on the whiteboards. An evil wretch (up there with Fluffy) named Slow Poke managed to steal his identity, credit cards, bank accounts, and appearance, then began to impersonate him to make him look bad. TurtleShroom (penguin) immediately believed his case, in which he claimed he was hacked, and had to face most of the database, particularly Agentgenius, in the battle. In the end, he was right, and this experience helped him, along with other heroes like Happyface and Metalmanager, win the Dollarface Scandal that exposed Fluffy 21 and saved Happyface's name.


Ben came back but was annihilated (again) shortly after Snowman's battle. When Slow Poke faked reform (sound familiar?) and tricked TSP, he managed to steal Snowman's identity AGAIN and created a smaller battle for Snowman's integrity. It was because of this that TurtleShroom (penguin) refused to trust Ben.


Unn Clubb Phengin Weekee[]

Later on, TurtleShroom found out about a secret project that was constructed under the Clubb Phengin Weekee, a blackboard known as the Unnderground Clubb Phengin Weekee. He knew that most Unnderground Weekees were usually full of things that which violated his views and beliefs, so he went down to check. He was appalled, as his guess was correct. His absence from that area has resulted in a chalkboard laden with nauseating filth. He was so angry that he demanded that it be gone. TSP called some of his friends, like the mighty Speeddasher and the obsessive Happyface, and together, they banned all mentionings of the Weekee 10 feet away from the original Clubb Phengin Weekee.

He was successful. Still, the blackboard returned with a vengeance when he departed, only to be quelled a final time when Hat Pop, who was webmaster (before that too was abolished), finally took a stand for herself and sealed the deal for good.

However, this does not mean that the blackboard was eradicated, quite the contrary. It is common knowledge that persecuted items grow faster under pressure, and the UCPW did just that. It thrived despite losing its only official entrance. Bypassing the CPW and the Bureau of Fiction altogether, the infamous chalkboard opened a secret portal somewhere in Antarctica, providing access to the realm that TurtleShroom (penguin) thinks is sealed off.

Late Weekee career[]

Time passed and the dictator aged, and he recalled one a Demon Penguin quote that had been said to him years ago:

"No Dictator has seen his empire last through the end of his reign without crumbling."


A Walrus Crime Ring raid was initiated at this time, pushing the users of the database, and TurtleShroom (penguin), to their limits when it came to banishment. There was a Walrus on every corner, whiteboard after whiteboard, writing "walruses where here" on previously developed whiteboards and driving the law abiding contributors insane with their immature swearing.


That too was stopped. Eventually.


The End of an Era[]

It wasn't until Ben made a final appearance that TurtleShroom (penguin)'s spirit finally broke. The full tale of that can be read elsewhere. After the defeat and further appointment of the new leaders, TSP entered a state of mild depression and retreated to his palace, where he occasionally ventures out to Club Penguin Island or to one of his many vacation homes in Antarctica or across the Holy Wikia.

Last Days[]

Right before TSP retreated from the site forever, several annoying and occasionally depressing blows blew through. ZapWire, who had been secretly plotting to assassinate TurtleShroom (penguin) with sockpuppets, started editing multiple templates with what TurtleShroom called lousy images and non-colorful pallets. He too was banned.

It was also voted to make an article on every piece of clothing ever distributed in Club Penguin, something TSP banned in his reign because he hated spam. This annoyed him, as did the slow deletion of user subpages and inclusion of non-CP userboxes covering things like "Windows" and "Favorite Games".

The biggest blow to him, however, was the decision by the people, egged on by Anti-Turtlenators, to allow a Leenk to a blackboard (AKA chalkboard) realm which he considered dangerous. He was convinced that warning signs were not enough, and he tried his hardest to stop it, but surrendered with advice from Saint Joeyaa.


Current Location Rumors[]

Lately, some conspiracy theorists have claimed that Explorer later offered TSP a high position in the Bureau of Fiction, which he accepted. This theory has been met with extreme skepticism, especially from the users of the Weekee. TSP was never known as a Fourth-Wall-breaker, and many believe TSP is simply locked up in his palace, in a state of depression.


Legacy[]

However, TurtleShroom (penguin) was never forgotten. Love him or hate him, the penguin had made an inescapable presence on the Clubb Phengin Weekee, one that is still felt to this day. He had received more awards than any penguin at the point of his resignation and had rewrote the site's history and law in his dictatorship. TurtleShroom was eventually taken off the Bureaucrat roster after being kindly convinced by Saint Joeyaa to leave, and he retreated to his palace where he still welcomes visitors.


Theme[]

thumb|40px|left|TSP's Theme.

Main article: TSP/The Turtlenator March

Right before his transition to evil, Dacula Hertz provided, quote, "an epic anthem suited for an epic dictator".

The result was this composition, entitled Farewell to Slavankia. This was what was played when TSP waddled out of the Weekee for the final time, and as Tigernose marched in. Interestingly, the ceremony was the first of its kind, and, due to the de-formalization instated by Tigernose's political machine (we are not administrators, we are normal users with privileges, not powers).

Involvement[]

As of now, TSP is usually wondering the immense corridors of his castle, taking teleporters to various places in Antarctica on the occasion for vacation. He spends most of his days at his residence in the Weekee, sitting and watching his empire disintegrate coupled with an annoying increase of articles on clothing. He is usually in his office, staring out the window and over the maze of whiteboards, watching friends and foes alike write on the Weekee, sighing routinely until he closes the blinds and looks at his achievements.

He entered a state of mild depression and one of degrading beliefs. He awaits company and welcomes visitors into his home, since he is its sole occupant. It gets lonely.




In the corporate world, he is rumored to fund or assist holy wars, vilgantes, yes-men, raw evil, theme parks, and pet projects.

Discography[]

Studio albums[]

Year Album details Chart peak positions
UTR CP USA FRZ PEN PUF DKL
2010 Whirlwind Tour


Singles[]

Year Song Peak chart positions Album
UTR CP USA FRZ PEN PUF DKL
Solo singles
2010 "Impress My Revestor"
Whirlwind Tour
"Censorship"
"I Shall Be a Mavv Banker"
"Censorship Killed a Good Story Arc"

Trivia[]

  • TurtleShroom's full name is "TurtleShroom (Penguin) Jones". His middle name actually has parenthesis in it, and his last name is actually Jones. This secret was kept until his brother's bank account was frozen.
  • In Antarctic schools, textbooks list TurtleShroom (penguin) as "a prominent figure in the history of local politics".
  • Historians regard him as "a villain whose heart was in the right place" and "the nicest dictator they ever met".
  • Most creatures who knew the penguin personally agree on this:

    "He was friendly and entertaining, and he always voiced his opinion without fear. However, he was extremely annoying, rather tyrannical, and stalked people."

  • TSP used to wear glasses before earning his Ninja mask.
  • Despite being a Ninja, TurtleShroom (penguin) is one of the absolute worst Card-Jitsu players to ever take up the sport. He losses far more than he wins, and admitted to losing to a white-belt ranked noob when he was on the brown-belt level. He states that "if anyone ever wants to become a ninja faster, play me and you'll probably win".

See also[]





Preceded by
Saint Robbsi
<font-size:95%>The Position of
Dictator of the Clubb Phengin Weekee,

as held by TurtleShroom (penguin)


July 6th, 2007 - July 3rd, 2009


Succeeded by
Hat Pop
Snowman 1001