The following policy has negated Committee because it just needs to be here.
Prologue
Joeyaa has clearly said, again and again: Revert, Block, Ignore.
With a rumored Walrus onslaught, it's time to implement a Fanon edition of that AS DOCTRINE.
My father and I discussed Walruses and I vowed to not make a big deal out of it. He said what Joeyaa said. Don't converse with them, block them and move on.
It's time for me to go along with it, wake up and smell the waffles.
-TS
Overview
REVERT, BLOCK, IGNORE, STORYBOOK
The process is simple.
- REVERT. See Walrus spam, kill it. Don't talk to the Walrus, and do NOT freak out.
- BLOCK. On the block expiry time drop-down menu, there is an infinity option (conveniently labeled "FOR ALL ETERNITY"). Use that, and again, no freaking out. We already have "Walrus Minion" block reason, so use it.
- IGNORE. The Walrus never happened, the Walrus is a lie. What Walrus? Wait, where am I? Why was I speaking about fat seals?
- STORYBOOK. As done on the Club Penguin Wiki's imports (see them all at category:Walrus and category:Str00del), make them into storybook characters. Why make a big deal about Walrus vandalism? Joeyaa calls that "feeding the trolls". Simply block the Walrus, remove his vandalism.
About Storybooking
Storybooking is the art of seeing the positive in the worst of vandals. Villains like TheWalrusWasPaul were changed into characters for use in any of your tales.
Instead of freaking out and turning Walrus Userpages into "ZOMG I IZ A WALRUS AND I IZ DUMB", thus "feeding the trolls" as Joeyaa put it, do the following.
Nice to know you're helping the wiki and starving the fat seals of lulz simultaneously, isn't it?
Process
STORYBOOKING PROCESS:
- Revert any and all vandalism the walrus user has done. Block the Walrus, do nothing else about it. Completely starve the fat seals of their Lulz.
- Move their user page to the Main space. If their name is unholy, change it to something clean. If not, leave the title as-is, just without the User: prefix. DO NOT USE THE LEAVE REDIRECT feature.
- Erase all of the previous content, if any, and begin writing the walrus character like any other. When you are finished, add template:Walrus. The template merely states that this creature is a Walrus, and conviently categorizes all Walruses for you. Plus, that "I haz a cellular" picture is funny.
- After the character is written, the user does not exist. IGNORE the user, focus on the character. Use characters in your stories.
SUGGESTIONS
Here are some suggestions and examples on storybooking.
Let's say a Walrus comes, blanks the TSP page, and his username is SuperWalrus{censored}.
Revert the vandalism, block the Walrus, and pretend it never happened. Now that you've successfully starved the Walrus, make use of the leftover page.
Use what you have. SuperWalrus{censored} is the Walrus' name and he vandalized TSP. What can you do with that? Well, first off, you must move the Walrus to a clean name on the Main Space. DO NOT' use the words "Stupid, Fail, Iditot", anything that would appear in the CPW Str00del doctrine. Be creative, not stupid.
Let's see, Super Walrus... spammed TSP... well, by the name, you could just move it to Super Walrus or SuperWalrus. NOT Super Walrus Fail or anything like that.
Okay, you have the name. Now, what did Super Walrus (the user) do? Well, he spammed TSP. Instead of spamming TSP, have the Fanon super walrus attack TSP or break a window on TSP's palace, for instance. make a whole article about his attempt, his defeat, what jail he's in, etc. Be creative!
These are mere suggestions, your imagination is the LIMIT!
Now that you have your basic concept, write it!
Let's try Super Walrus.
First off, here's what NOT to do:
LOLZ I Iz a dUmb w4lruz and i can't R33d.
This isn't a Str00del page, it's a character.
Try this:
Super Walrus is a superpowered, umm, walrus, and a member of the Walrus Crime Ring. Unlike many walruses, this walrus can be considered a threat because of his tusks of steel and abilities of flight.
Get the point?
Now, reference the Walrus' deeds appropriately:
Super Walrus once threatened to break all of TSP's palace windows if he didn't bow to his will. The frightening part, at least for the dictator, was that this threat was issued two stories up, and the Walrus was floating outside. Fortunately, (whoever blocked the Walrus) managed to come and (use power, ability, banhammer, anything) and saved the Dictator from certain high insurance prices.
As you can see, a vandal has been stripped of whatever feeding he could get and made into a character for the site's use.
Like the Str00del Force, there has to be some dumb characters in any group. If you see a really' immature or stupid Walrus, revert his edits, block him, and pretend he never existed. Move the user name and storybook him similar to the example above, making sure to parody his "contributions". However, don't feed him by Str00delizing his page.
If the Walrus gave you an inspiration to an article, make him a good-guy Walrus, like Iron Walrus!
Conclusion
"Saint" Joeyaa was right all along. If we revert, block, and ignore the Walruses, they'll go away, leaving us ideas and inspiration for characters and stories.
Don't see a Walrus as a vandal who must be stopped. See a Walrus as an inspiration for a new Walrus character when you're finished starving him of the intention he craves.
REVERT, BLOCK, IGNORE, STORYBOOK. It's so easy, even a CHAIR could do it!
Remember: REVERT, BLOCK, IGNORE, STORYBOOK. RBIS, simple as that.
This Also Applies to Any Vandal
Remember that now.
--† कछुए मशरूम! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! † :) :) DON'T YOU DARE QUIT BECAUSE OF WHAT I JUST TYPED!!!!!!!! † 11:55, September 6, 2009 (UTC)
P.S.: I'M A CHAIR.