Constitution of the United States of Antarctica

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 * Not to be confused with the GourdZoid version.

The , also known simply as the Consitution, is the legal document to which the entire government of the USA was founded upon. It outlined the basic principles and powers of the government, as well as the framework for any future laws passed on the federal level. Originally inteded to be a repair to the Articles of Loose Togetherness, this powerful document was drafted from scratch by some of the most PWNsome folks of the 1990s.

Background

 * Main article: Constitution Writing Squad

After the EPIC FAIL of the Articles of Loose Togetherness, the Constitution Writing Squad came back to session at Club Penguin's Night Club with the intent to revise it and make it less fail. Many famous penguins attended, and delegates from every modern state (except Pengolia which didn't exist until 2003) attened and battled each other for government fairness, balence, stability, and most importantly, ease of use.

The wacky statesmen often had personal gain on their minds (particularly Mabel von Injoface XVIII, Mabel's mother), so the battle was long and hard. Compromises ensued, and Mabel XVIII is rumored to have added stuff to the document at the last second.........

The entire thing was ordered to be kept secret. That meant shutting down the Night Club, turning off the music, closing the windows and placing guards in every entrance and the roof. They wrote by candlelight to ensure that no one would know of what happened in there. They only wanted the Masses to know the result, not the battles that made it.

Text
THE UBER 1337 CONSTITUTION OF THE KRYTOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF THE UNITED STATES OF ANTARCTICA

Preamble
WE THE CREATURES, IN ORDER TO FORM A BETTER UNION THAN THE LAST ONE, ESTABLISH BANHAMMERS AND GUARENTEE THE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITY, TO PROVIDE FOR THE CREATURES' DEFENSE, UPGRADE EVERYONE'S WELFARE AND, SECURE THE GLORY OF EPIC WIN TO OURSELVES AND OUR PROSPERITY. WE'LL ORDAIN AND SET UP THIS HERE CONSTITUTION, OF THE UNITED STATES OF ANTARCTICA.

It is for the reasons outlined, and because the Articles of Loose Togetherness were the biggest Epic Fail since the King, that the Constitutional Writing Squad has re-assembled to write a new governing body which will be so better than anything that our Former Tyrant's momma could ever produce.

We who have convened hereby guarentee that any and all creatures within the Jurisdiction that this document controls shall be able to access its freedoms.

We also guarentee that this document shall uphold the basic things that all penguins, no, all CREATURES should have, and that what we worked our tail feathers off fighting for shall never again resurface. Never again shall the Masses be enslaved by a tyrannical Noob that we actually refered to as King!

LET'S GET IT ON!

Article One
Considering all the ideas drafted in the period of unrest, we have chosen to establish a KRYTOCRACY to govern the new Nation. A Rule by the Gavel has been chosen, for what better to enforce the laws then they who preside and know them best? After all, not everyone can wear black robes and sit in big chairs!
 * ARTICLE ONE.

May it be established, firmly and completely, that Judges shall be the enforcing body of these United States.

A unipartisian Legislature, consisting of one Delegate for each State, and one delegate for any major City or Municipal Establishment that wishes to join, shall be held every few weeks at the Capital of this fair Land, wherever that capital may be.

Article One Section One
SECTION ONE Laws enacted by this Governing Body apply to whoever needs it, be it Federallly or control of one city. These laws can not, and nor will they, ever enfringe the Rights of the Creatures living in wherever they control.

Article One, Section One, Clause One

 * SECTION ONE CLAUSE 1:


 * THE VILLAIN CLAUSE
 * UNLESS THAT CREATURE IS A POMPUS PUFFLE OR A VILLAIN REGARDED BY THE LEGISLATURE AS A VILLAIN AND A THREAT TO THE SECURITY OF THE COUNTRY. PARTICULARLY IF IT IS A POMPUS PUFFLE.

Article One, Section One, Clause Two

 * SECTION ONE CLAUSE 2:


 * THE VON INJOFACE'S WHINING OVERRIDE CLAUSE
 * VILLAINS CAN BE EXEMPT FROM CLAUSE ONE SHOULD THEY REFORM. POMPUS PUFFLES, BY HERIDITARY BINDINGS, DON'T HAVE RIGHTS, SO WE CAN'T INFRINGE THEM BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOTHING TO INFRINGE.

Article One, Section One, Clause Three

 * SECTION ONE CLAUSE 3:


 * THE MABEL MUST BE QUIET CLAUSE
 * MABEL, AND ANY RELATIVES PRIOR OR YET TO COME, EVEN IF THEY PARTAKE IN ANY NAME OR VIA LEGAL NAME CHANGE IN A USA COURT OF LAW, SHALL CEASE COMPLAINING, HENCEFORTH AND FOREVER MORE, ABOUT CLAUSE ONE AND TWO AS OUTLINED ABOVE, BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO RIGHTS DUE TO THEIR DUMB EVILS. -Explorer V

Article One, Section Two
SECTION TWO It is the Duty (hee hee, we wrote duty) of this Legislature to Uphold and Listen to the Voice of the Masses. If they don't like it, the Legislature better Listen.

Article One, Section Two, Clause One
Unless the Masses solely consist of any Mabel or a powerful (or not) member in her Family Tree.

SECTION THREE The Creatures in the District of which a Delegate Represents have the right to an Optional Vote, by Majority Rule, who gets to come in and run on the Legislature. However, the Creatures must Call a Vote to be Organized. If the creatures fail to Call a delegate vote, the Delegate shall be appointed by the Chief Justice of the legislature. The Vote is Optional.

MORE TO COME, BEDTIME.

CONCLUSION


 * WRITTEN ON THIS DATE, AND ENDING JANAURY FIRST, TWO THOUSAND A.D., WITH THE PROGRAMMERS AS OUR WITNESS AND HISTORY AS OUR JUDGE, MAY THIS LEGAL DOCUMENT BE FOREVER BINDING TO THE ESTABLISHMENT OF THE COUNTRY THAT FOLLOWS THE SINGING OF THIS THING AND TO ALL LAWS PASSED. MAY EVERYTHING BE DONE FOR THE CREATURES, OF THE CREATURES, AND BY THE CREATURES


 * WADDLE ON,
 * DELEGATES OF THE CONSTITUTIONAL WRITING SQUAD
 * {delegate signatures}