Battle of George Washing Machine Laundromat

The Battle of George Washing Machine's Laundromat, also called Operation Big Laundry, was an extremely successful sneak-attack campaign made by the Revolutionists on a Loyalist-occupied stronghold of mercenaries. They ambushed them on the day they were washing their uniforms, having not done so in weeks.

The victory here, though minor in scale, was a major moral boost to the Revolutionist faction.

The battle
Having failed at many battles before, the Revolutionists were downtrodden. The Loyalists had hired Snoss and Viking Empire mercenaries to do much of their dirty work, and as long as they were paid, they fought. Indeed, this philosophy, while getting plenty of warriors to fight, had its drawbacks. If the going got tough, the tough didn't exist. Mercenary loyalty is to their wallet, not their country/employer.

These mercenaries had gathered the day before to set up camp near a remote laundromat and have their clothes cleaned for further conquests. They smelled horrible and needed it badly. They were to begin washing their inventories at dawn and ending at dusk.

The Revolutionists saw this as the ultimate oppurtunity to strike. That night, they camped down in a dell not too far from the laundromat, a small wooded valley known as Aware Dell. The dell was across the road and downwards. The Revolutionists merely needed to climb the hill and weave through the trees. That and the road were all thar stood between the mercenaries and the Revolutionists. They didn't light a fire or use any electronics that whole day or night, so that the lights wouldn't give them away, as they were at a disadvantage being downhill in the forests.

The saddened troops, having faced far too much defeat, felt hesitant to charge on an enemy force. They were also hungry and hadn't been able to obtain new clothes in weeks. The geenrals knew this, and they took the oppurtunity to read from yet another Thomas Ouch pamphlet that truly made them feel better. Now happier, the troops decided to carry out their mission.

As night fell and the mercenaries went to sleep, the Revolutionists sneaked out with their weapons and began to quietly trek up the hill and through the forest, passing the road. They were careful not to step on any twigs or branches, though the unavoidable did happen. No one was stirred by this in the enemy camp.

As they crossed the road, one penguin, a Dark Penguin, failed to look both ways before crossing. She was smashed by a big-rig tractor-trailer zooming by, killing her instantly. This was the only death taken by the Revolutionists.

Approaching the camp, the group turned as they crossed the road and sneaked behind the ornate laundromat, entering through a back door. They went inside and cut the power by severing the wires, so that even if they lost, the mercenaries couldn't get clean clothes

Some of them took their weapons and went to the second story of the laundromat, positioning themselves in windows and aiming their weapons at the mercenary camp.

The rest of the troops exited through the front door of the laundromat and stormed the camp. They opened fire and injured hundreds of mercenaries before they could even get up and fight back.

After a while, the dust settled, and the mercenaries were strongly injured. Those that weren't in pain were caring for those in pain, allowing the Revolutionists to capture them or watch them run. Seven of the runners escaped, but failed to look both ways before crossing the road. They too were flattened.

This victory primarily boosted the morale of the troops, and they were able to obtain a lot more clothing for their ranks.

The laundromat itself
Main Article: George Washing Machine's Laundromat

George Washing Machine's Laundromat is one of the oldest laundromats in Antarctica, founded in 1967 and run by the same family ever since. The ornate, two-story building contains rows and rows of washing machines on both floors. Sadly, they do not recieve very many customers because they are in such a remote location. The building is extremely fancy and resembles more of a luxurious estate than a laundromat on the outside. The building is larger than it looks, though.