Talk:Revenge of the Fangirls

Incredible... unbelievable... masterpiece....... WOW.
My goodness.... I stand in the presence of a literary masterpeice laden with more canonical references and spine-tingling storyline than any three of my tales combined. You sir... or ma'am ...are a master author, and I am awed by your work.

So delicately did you balence the holiness mandate; you just barely eeked by with a PG, even incorporating a nice bruising and some blood in there! So amazingly did you obey the laws of the site, yet gripped us in this enthralling masterpiece!

Nitpicking
Yes, there are a continuity errors, but if I was to go in and fix them, there'd be little to do. As you are a better storyteller than me on this, I guess I'll advise instead of revise. You mostly made errors on the way CP's economy and apartheid functions.

This happended to my character, who happened to be visiting CP on the day his member dues expired. He lost his CP member vacation home due to repo, and because he himself was there, they swiped everything in his inventory made by CP on CP.
 * Fanon-wise, we depict CP as a less brutal when it comes to membership. We toned down their apartheid years ago (back when it was slim and not even qualifiable as such) in respect for the game. Now that it has come so far as to visibly and easily segregate all CP residents, we stick to the old membership policies as they were in December of 2007. Membership was once an option to make the game far better, not a compulsion whose alternative is barely able to do anything except watch in jealousy.
 * In this wiki's universe, only the elitist Member Igloos pay member dues to be easily accessible. All residential/neighborhood/subarban areas are allowed to have igloos with furniture and upgrades, but they can't purchase anything made in Club Penguin. In other words, they have to import their wares to CP, as they are shut out of the internal economy.
 * They aren't shut out from the continental trade and markets. They just miss out the local luxuries like CP-brand clothing at the Gift Shop, CP-brand igloos, ect. Of course, CP wares are far better quality than the mainland, but to use them, one must pay dues. Failure to pay dues results in repossession on the day of expiry, and, if the penguin is present, all they carry gets repoed as well.


 * There are also special residential servers, where the Dock, Lighthouse, Ski Lodge, and Mine Shack are not present (but everything else is), knocked voer to make room for collosal urban sprawl.
 * CP does not have slums. You can compensate for your character's predicament in that he refuses to submit to "The Man" (or whatever) by buying nothing from the mainland. No furniture, no upgrades, no licenses or permits, no nothing. Just cold snow. To buy from the mainland is to accept CP's gated community and membership dues. Ever the rebel and for the sake of pride, BASE has chosen nothing over imports. He will never bow!
 * CP gives all residents a weenie little igloo and novelty items at parties. Import prices from the mainland are double the local economy, making the members an elite class with better and cheaper wares than the unwashed commoners.


 * The fangirl with a taser had to have either built that taser or obtained it from the mainland. CP does not sell weapons and has no standing army, save the volunteer EPF and ninjas.


 * The member money given to CP is, canonically and as stated by the Penguin Times, re-invested into their closed member system. Everyone is non-profit and they recycle their money over and over and over and encourage members to keep buying. The newspaper, written by CP itself, is canonical and thus law. All must obey the canonical law. Canonical decrees state that they also use this to upkeep their buildings and projects, which is why CP could be comepletely independant of Antarctica and still have a thriving, sustainable economy. True, CP's gated-community apartheid could easily belly up if enough members stopped purchasing, but the bubble is held by the ravenous spend-spend-spend of CP's elite.
 * This is a sure-fire economic bubble. It could pop someday, and folks at Club Penguin Stock Trade Center have been shouting this for years!


 * Rockhopper does not have ties to the member's apartheid. RH is, canonically and therefore here, an extremely benovelent and caring philantropist. He would gladly sell all he has to all penguins each time he comes, but he runs into CP municipal law when he does. You see, RH's shop was first set up in CP, and he always sells at CP. Therefore, Rockhopper is counted as a Club Penguin store, and must obey the rules of CP stores. That means he can't sell anything to the Masses. He must either give stuff to the non-members or sell stuff to the elite, like any other shop. Rockhopper was afraid to sail to the mainland and knew the Migrator couldn't handle navigating the coasts like that. Plus, he was raised on Club Penguin and always loved the populace. Even with such draconian regulations, the love of his homeland and admiration of his friends and fans keeps him coming back.
 * It would be character development to do this and I'm never a fan of developing canonical stuff, but I think that Rockhopper personally dislikes the membership policy. I believe that it hurts his big heart to see all of those non-members, as much a crew as the elite, to be deprived of the wares he finds and brings to them every so often simply because of an economic doctrine set by a few unknown and greedy councilmen. He would much rather sell to all.
 * I hold that all famous penguins agree with RH, but they can't do anything about it despite their power and ability to cause a riot. After all, they can be banned just like a normal penguin.


 * You said "soul" in this article. You can't say "soul" in the mainspace, just everywhere else.


 * It would be better for the penguin calling for his murder to call for his deletion.


 * G, RH, and Sensei would feel sympathy for BASE and defend him. After all, they are famous and have fangirl issues just as much as BASE. Famous penguins have to protect each other, and BASE would find solace with any famous penguin. They know how it is. Have you ever wondered why G always has spare labcoats? Fangirls take them, of course!


 * There are minor anatomy errors. Penguins can't make fists, they don't have hands or arms, and when they stash something away, they place it in their player card's inventory or in a clothing pocket, not an invisible pocket on their side.


 * BASE's statement that buddy lists are pointless is partially true. In CPFW's universe, Buddy Lists do precisely what they do on CP, except extended to the mainland. Naturally, though, penguins enshrine the Buddy List as the ultimate in friendship. Husbands usually have their wives on there, chicks their parents, business partners one-another, and Masters their co-workers.

Praise
...-but enough about that! Let's get down to what really matters!


 * FANGIRLS! - YES YES YES! I have always wanted to see the fanaticism given to so many character (from AA to RH to G to Bugzy) played out in literature! You, my good man, have PERFECTLY EXECUTED this literary dream! I love it!


 * CANONICAL!! - Coffee Shop, Card-Jitsu, Pizza Parlor!! So perfectly mentioned, so frequently referenced! How so many have longed for such a thing as this, where CP takes center stage with few frills added!


 * ACTION! - Tasers and beatings and candelit conspiracies, OH YES! They are all within legal grounds, no less!! You could singlehandedly put ANYONE who wants to "Raise the Bar" to rest simply with a link! Who says you can't enthrall your audience with a PG tale?


 * LITERAY ADAPTATION OF A CLASSIC CANONICAL SCENARIO! - Why do they seek revenge? BASE removed them from their buddy list and "broke their heart"! Oh, that's so classic on CP; I can't imagine how many times I have turned down an "ADD ME" to the same results! You executed and transitioned this flawlessly and in ways I could never have done! Despite my nitpicking, you NAILED IT. See, my definition above applies to far more influential creatures, like Explorer, TSP, Willy, or Triskelle. Only a hundred names long, if you are on someone's buddy list, you are supposed to mean a lot to them.
 * Well-connected penguins rarely delete, but your average CP Joe changes it daily. Only a hundred names long, if you are on someone's buddy list, you are supposed to mean a lot to them. Of course, that's only if you use it for intention. Pardon the pun, but your everyday Joe Q. Public penguin uses it mainly to pick up chicks. Heh heh.


 * EXTREME ROMANCE! - Never since Pufflezzz have I seen it played so eloquently! They want revenge for alleged wrongs done to them, manifested in a simple one-hundred line list! They are fanitical and insane in their burning passions, and their revenge and insanity is PRICELESS and fantastic to read!


 * PREFECT GRAMMAR! - It is so refreshing to see someone spell right and use fluent structure! Rarely, if ever, does a new user do that! Thank you, thank you thank you! BASE, you amaze me! I see a PROMOTION your way in the very, very, very near future! You'll be a rollback by mid-November!


 * GRIPPING STORYLINE! - I read it from cover to cover, eagerly depicting every detail in my mind. I was enthralled as if I was reading a real book, entertained as if I held a carbon copy of your tale in my hand. I MUST KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!! DO NOT LEAVE ME HANGING AS I DO!


 * FRESH AND UNIQUE! - There is NOTHING ELSE LIKE THIS on this site! You're new, you're creative, you're on a roll, with pure, unedited, awe-inspiring brilliance! BASE, you may be a key to our next Golden Age! For the sake of this site, write more! Honor us with your presence! I'M SUCH A HUGE FAN!


 * EPIC CHARACTER! I JUST MET YOU AND I AM NOW A COLLOSAL FAN! - Your penguin, BASE, has the rounded and complex persoanlity that deems him worthy, nay, DESERVING of hoardes of nutty fangirls! There's no Mary Sue, no ego inflation! It's only NATURAL for a character that great to have leigons of psychos clinging to him! I'll even help you; I'll take it FURTHER than you planned! BASE, my dear, brilliant man who commands the English language, have I got expansions for you! I plan to have TurtleShroom (penguin), my character, a dictator, a king, a billionaire, a string-puller, a ruler and master of censorship, fall to the floor in awe of your precense, praising your name and humbled by your mere standing there. That's right! Your fans aren't just limited to everyday females with nothing to do! Your fame is continental! The entire Jones family adores your work (whatever it is, I'll assume it's writing), and any one of them would shriek and bow to the floor in BASE's esteemed presence! You're THAT EPIC! It's the least I can do to reward you!


 * GENIUS! MASTERPIECE! INCREDIBLE! - I hope you get it: YOU HAVE A GIFT. Your command of the English language, your oration and epic depiction of stories in the most vivid detail I've seen since the greats of yore (as Triskelle, ZK, PogoPunk), and even rivalling my own lexicon (maybe surpassing), is a gift, and you MUST bless us with MORE.
 * I may be a good writer, but I have huge gaps in my skill. I can't write drama, romance, war, or violence. Even a murder scene, if I wrote it, would have tinges of humor, lightheartedness, or comic relief in it. I'd never swear or put too much of an edge to it, partially because I'm a happy and religious man, and possibly because I am simply incapable of it. I really do envy your skill to write drama and scenes where folks get beaten up. All I can do is shove a nerd into a locker when I write... you can realistically and legitimately beat him to a pulp, break his glasses, and leave him standing there emotionally scarred... like a real bully would. I called out for a man like you back in November 2008, and after nearly two years, I know I've found it. Please, don't leave us.

I stand in awe
Words can not describe the show you've put on for us in this tale, nor the creativity and brilliance you ooze. I am now your biggest fan and I await any work you participate in. I would be HONORED for my characters to meet you, and I would gladly have them humble themselves in your penguin's presence.

If you decide to go with some fanon-based aspects of CP, such as the Club Penguin Stock Exchange, rest assured that on entering the floor, the economists would part like the Sea of Reeds for Moses, so that you can get to what you want to invest in, exactly as they would for Rockhopper, Aunt Arctic, or any other legend. For BASE is exactly that: a legend.

I am honroed to even be reading your work. Don't let your biggest fan down, BRANCH OUT! KEEP WRITING! LET'S SEE SOME MORE! WHOO!!

 -- † TurtleShroom™! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! †    :)  :)  Take a cookie. Go ahead; they're not poison.      †        †       Wikia Staff, you brood of vipers, you hypocrites!     –    –     23:02, October 5, 2010 (UTC)  