Dorkugal

The island nation of Dorkugal is a technology hot spot as well as the site of the first explorers since Pengiaville. Populated almost entirely by nerds, the landscape is very odd indeed. Yet despite all of these amazing technological advancements, their shipbuilding skills match that of the 1500s' era of Europe. In other words: wooden, wind powered galleons with a GPS on them.

Census
Population: 1,777,340 estimate. (110110001111010111100 in binary) Race: 82% Nerds, 9,1% Evil Fords, 8.3% Jerks, 0.4% Normal Penguins, 0.2% Geeco-Dorkugese

Government
Type: Noocracy (pronounced NOOOOO-crash-see) - Governed by CEO (Crowned Executive Officer) Motto: Where do you want to go today? Primary Spoken Language: English Primary Written Languages: English, Binary Code, HTML, Leet

Data
Imports: None Exports: Computers

Background


Pi and Phi Island were first settled by nerds expelled from Club Penguin on December 3rd, 1999. Exiled in fear of Y2K, G wanted to brace the island for impact and thought the nerds and all of their technology might disrupt the servers that distribute the population, thus resulting in millions of penguins all raining down on one server, inflicting mass overpopulation (eventually causing the island to dissipate).

Discovery
The nerds were given several Hydro Hopper boats, enough supplies for four (4) years, and Spy Phones to keep in touch with the mainland. Intended to navigate to what is now Pengmaniaville, the took a wrong turn and crashed onto an uninhabited island. When asked later, the older nerds replied with "we were all talking about Doors 2007 and Mabel, so the navigators stopped driving to listen... and the next thing we knew, we collided with a foreign landmass of uninhabited status".

Populating Dorkugal
Realizing no one lived here, the geeks decided to build a land from scratch. Taking samples from the soil, the found it rich in silicon, boron, phosphorus, and copper, the primary items in computers. They also found some good wood, and used this to build their houses with the robots they built out of the Hydro Hopper boat's spare parts and some silicon. As the city began to be established, the nerds finally got the island online after months of work. From there, they took seeds and altered them to grow things they needed. Trees have been created that can grow floppy disks, for instance and there are bushes where monitors can grow.

G has asked the residents of this island hundreds of times how they made a plant grow a computer, and they always reply with "that's our secret".

Unfortunately, they lacked the resources to get steel, iron, or any building material except wood. After having ample living space, they established their land and named it "Dorkugal" in 2001, considering everyone on the island were nerds. They also took the four years supply of food and planted it it on spare land. Using wood, robots, and dirt, they made multi story greenhouses reinforced by solid copper and silicon sprayed with Ditto C solution. Using these, they now have an abundant food supply, and they get their drinking water by removing salt (desalinizing) from the ocean.

After a while, the nerds got bored with building satellite dishes, playing on the Internet, and assigning funny names to one another. Yet, the nerds couldn't decide on anything to do. Pondering their situation, they decided to call up Explorer 767 and ask him what to do. He responded by stating that when he was bored, he got off the computer and went outside to explore Nature. "They don't call me Explorer for nothing!" he said.

The Enlightenment
The Dorkugese were stunned. By 2007, when six years and 3.14 generations after they settled on this island, it was practically like a self-sufficient space station. Everything these rapidly multiplying population of geeks could ever need, food, shelter, water, exercising equipment... everything was indoors. Even the plant greenhouses were indoors now, they found a way to make the plants grow better and healthier with LED lights. Some of the baby nerds, born on the island as the pi-eth generation didn't even know what the "sun" looked like. Sure, they could tell you it was a star 93,000 miles away and that it burned on nuclear fusion like a Snell-Libro, but they never went outside. They never felt sunshine, or laid under trees. Everything was indoors. Ironically, every building was also made out of wood. They got around outdoors by making robots bring them cloned wood... weird.

Yet, the nerds of Dorkugal could no longer stand the sheer boredom, and so their CEO (the equivalent of a king), Billy Fence I, decided to call up Ross Island, an island of the USA, and speak to them about a cure for their boredom. They wanted to know how they could get outside. At first the Adelie penguins laughed at the dork's statement, claiming "if the lived on an island, they should know how to have some fun", and then told them to "put their brilliant minds to work". After three months of research, database hunting, photograph viewing, and interviews of the USA residents, it dawned on them: An island is surrounded by water on four sides! They could relieve boredom by building boats and driving them around! Yet, they lacked any materials except wood, silicon, and of course the cloned cotton and fabric that they brought with them in 1998.

This was another dilemma. They had the technology to navigate, but not the materials to build a ship. Thus, they looked up the Internet and found some blueprints and basics on Rockhopper's Migrator. The building of ships had begun.

The Age of Exploration
In 2007, the Dorkugese sent out an eager geek named Vasco de Gah! in a galleon with three robots, twelve penguins, and a GPS system (which only had coverage of Antarctica and Pengmaniaville), ready to venture out into the unknown. Unfortunately, the Antarctic Cirumpolar Current pushed them into the Magellan Strait and their boat, the Tangent, was wrecked on a sandbar. While in South America, de Gah! discovered a weird species called Homo sapiens living on the continent. The geeks at Dorkugal did extensive research, and discovered a site called Wikipedia that listed facts about the so-called humans. Using resources he found, de Gah! rebuilt Tangent and sailed back to Dorkugal on the Weddell Gyre.

Culture
Write it!

Cuisine
The Dorkguese primarily eat dairy-coated wheat and greasy foods like the McDoodles Big Pack. They eat sugary snacks like chocolate on special days.

Pastimes
Defragmenting their hard drives, building computers from scratch, calculating pi to the thousandth decimal, ect.

National Holidays
Computer Day: July 1st

Tax Day: April 15th

International Dorkugal Apreciation Day: May 25th

Pi Day: March 14th

Architecture
Write it!

ect.

Customs
Like many exotic lands, there are some things that are done everyday in other nations that should never be done in Dorkugal and its surrounding areas. Also, see How To Be A Nerd.

Nerd Customs

 * NEVER mock the robes that the Dorkugese wear, and especially do not refer to them as "medieval". That is possibly the highest Dorkugese insult there is.


 * It is considered impolite in Dorkugal to shove someone into a locker or other confinement.


 * Rapping or beatboxing in Dorkugal is banned, except in "designated hip-hop zones", indicated by a special sign.


 * It is considered rude, if you are a guest in a Dorkugese home, to not use the host's computer.


 * When meeting, Dorkugese penguins do not shake flippers. They bow. To shake flippers when not sealing a deal is considered impolite.


 * Burping in public is considered stupid.


 * Yummy Canned Ham is banned in Dorkugal.


 * By law, if you do not remove your shoes when entering a Dorkugese home, the host has the right to step on your foot. Shoes are to be worn in the halls and public areas of the Skyscrapers only.


 * Leaving a computer with unclosed windows left on it is considered lazy.


 * Floppy Disks, though obsolete, are the national symbol of Dorkugal and are to be treated with respect. In fact, penguins from Dorkugal invented a floppy disk capable of store 8 gigabytes.

Jerk Customs

 * The proper greeting in Jerk custom is "Yo!", not "hello".


 * Shaking flippers in Jerk custom is considered a sign of weakness. The proper formal greeting is to high-five.


 * Instead of sealing a business deal by handshake, Jerks perform that fist thing, even though penguins can not make fists.


 * Traditionally, Jerk penguins accepting awards or other items of merit will "give props" to others who may have assisted them, or as a sign of respect/thanks.


 * Spraypainting grafitti is legal in any Jerk occupied area between 9:00 AM and 8:00 PM.


 * Jerk inspectors monitor all grafitti for obscenities, citing "we rappers, not rudesters".


 * Swearing, in Jerk culture, is a "pathetic and weak form of insult", looked down upon both in Jerk night clubs and in general. Most Jerks state that "to truly insult someone, you need to be creative", also citing that swearing is "unoriginal", "rude", and "downright wrong, dawg".

Jock Customs

 * Never say "Yo" or bow as a greeting. The proper greeting is either "Whats up?" or a simple "Hello" (though Jocks rarly say "hello"). If you don't greet them this way, there is a chance that they'll football tackle you.


 * Never shake flippers. A soft slap on the back is the propper way.


 * It is considered rude if you don't play a sport with them if your a guest at your house.


 * If you see a Jerk doing graffiti in any Jock owned area, you are to football tackle them.


 * If you don't want to play sport with them as guest then you are to go with the Jocks to football tackle Jerks or shove a nerd in a locker.


 * Graffiti is is illegal in any Jock occupied zones at any times.


 * You are never to go to a Jerk night club. The propper hang out is any local Football field.


 * You are never to attack a fellow Jock. Attacking a fellow Jock will result in a Football tackle 300 times.


 * You must go against all Jerk customs except their last rule which is swearing is a "pathetic and weak insult". And anyway, it violates the COC.

Involvement
Dorkugal has a heavy influence on the USA.
 * It is the opening scene of the true story Quest for the Golden Waffle.
 * It is rumored to be the location of the legendary Shrine of Constants, which is said to hold the first clue to the ingredients of the Golden Waffle.
 * It is also the site of the holiday classic A Thanksgiving Carol
 * It is considered to be the discoverer of "humans".
 * The Sapie Brothers frequently speak of it, though they mispronounce it as Portugal.
 * Dorkugal is also the home of the hugely popular Uber Bowl.

Places


The archipelago consists of two islands: Pi Island and Phi Island. The islands are shaped like pi and phi, respectively. Dorkugal is entirely located inside a sealed, ninety-story wooden skyscraper (dubbed the Googolplex by the CEO) that covers Pi and Phi Island. Every possible luxury is inside there, from movie theaters to excercise rooms, and even a golf course on Floor Seventy-Nine. Due to this, the Dorkugese have not left the Googolplex in seven years. The ships are currently undergoing production.

Exterior (outside the Googolplex)
 * Mathematical Strait
 * Dorkugal Bridge
 * Pie Sea
 * Turtle Sea
 * Evil Lake
 * Explorer Gulf
 * Googolplex
 * Dorkugese Jungle - computer themed: blue screens of death, ect.
 * Statue of Education

Interior (inside the Googolplex) Main Article:Googolplex

Currency
The currency of Dorkugal is in radians (the radian has no notation). This form of currency was recently approved by the Supreme Court of Dorkugal, and is described by the nerds as "totally 'rad'." One radian is equal to 18 Fishes, or 360 Pebbles.

Penghis Khan has once said, "The currency looks like pick."

Villains

 * "Jerks": cruel, bullying penguins who pick on the Dorkugese.
 * "Evil Fords": evil creatures who are trying to take over the intire Antartic Continent, starting by Dorkugal.
 * "Focci": Evil bat-like ellipses that attack passerby. Some are good, though.
 * "Jock Penguins": related to Jerks except that they would usually get into a gang fight with them, they're not rappers, they're against Jerk customs, and that they're very sporty.
 * "MicroX": He bullies everyone in sight. He mostly bullies Jerks though, so in a way the Dorkugese consider him a hero.

Resources
Dorkugal is a land abundnent in silicon, boron, phosphorus, copper, and wood, which work great in building both computers and ships.

Notable Residents of Dorkugal
Dorkugal has had many notable and/or influential residents and characters:


 * 一人は非常にスマートですコンピュータで, Sensei's Nephew, usaually called "Mathster". He is the greatest computer teacher in the USA.
 * Vasco de Gah!, discovered humans in a distant nation.
 * Billy Fence I, the first Dorkugese CEO/King.
 * Stevie Falcon I, the second Dorkugese CEO/King.
 * Edwin Freezer Luge, the main antagonist from "A Thanksgiving Carol".
 * Fred 676, Dorkugal's ambassador.
 * Al Sirvenxo, a con salespenguin.
 * Doctor Atik McAfee, one of the two doctors considered the greatest to ever exist in their field.
 * Doctor Norton von Symantec, one of the two doctors considered the greatest to ever exist in their field.
 * Henry Residence, another legendary medic.

Related Topics

 * Crowned Executive Officer
 * Dorkugese - the race of penguins which inhabitant Dorkugal
 * Geeco-Dorkugese - a subspecies of Dorkugese endemic to the Geek Empire
 * Geek Empire - The rival to Dorkugal in most everything industrious (technology, luxiries, leisure, ect.), except tourism. The GE is under Semi-Machine Rule, so tourism is less.
 * Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind (Allys of the species. They are not of the same tribes, though.
 * Tax Day - the biggest holiday in Dorkugal. The Dorkugese are the only ones who like to pay taxes.