Substitutiary Locomotion

Substitutiary Locomotion is a true story, about the Khanzem. It takes place in Nineteen Fourteen, in what is now Freezeland.

Prolouge
It was a quiet and peaceful night in Tottenham town, which is ner modern day Frostborough. A High Penguin woman called Miss Price, equivalent to about fouty five regular Penguin years, was caretaking her two nephews and one neice, who's Mother was sent to a concentrate camp, and Father was fighting in the Khanzem. It was after supper, the children were bathed and had their pygamas on.

Part One
During the night, a Naughtzee raiding party invades Miss Price's house. She and the chicks are taken to the village armoury and museum. Mister Browne, another High Penguin from the town who fancys Miss Price, discovers Naughtzee at the rail station, cutting telephone wires and engaging in other acts of sabotage. After foiling them, he returns to Miss Price's igloo. Finding it overrun, he breaks into the workshed and turns himself into a puffle, using an old High Penguin spell, to evade capture and follows the group to the castle.

At first, Miss Price's Substitutiary Locomotion spell does not work. She points at the pair of wellingtons she is trying to cast the spell on again.

"Treguna Mekoides and Trecorum Satis Dee!" She says in a plain, traditional voice.

"Nuffing 'append!" Said the youngest of the Chicks, just before his elder sister put her flipper over his beak.

"It's too old fashioned," Said Mister Browne "This is the twentieth century, after all."

"Well what do you suggest, Mister Browne?"

"Hmmm," Browne pondered. "Needs a tempo, rythym, music. As I always say, 'Do it with a flare'!"

He cleared his throat. "Alright, young ones! We need all the help we can get!" Browne practiced a rythym quietely, hinting them to humm, sing, or snap. They started a rythym of "Treguna Mekoides, Trecorum Satis Dee!"

Miss Price started to sing.

"Treguna Mekoides and Trecorum Satis Dee! Substitutiary locomotion, Mystic power that's far beyond the wildest notion. It's a weird so feared, yet wonderful to see! Substitutiary locomotion come to me."

Miss Price hinted the chicks to join in.

"Treguna Mekoides and Trecorum Satis Dee! I don't want locomotiary substitution! Or remote intrasitory convolution! Only one precise solution is the key, Substitutiary locomotion it must be! Treguna Mekoides and Trecorum Satis Dee!"

Miss Price pointed to the yellow wellingtons and said the chant again. "Treguna Mekoides and Trecorum Satis Dee". The Yellow rain boots started to dance around the room like mad! Everyone joined in, Dancing with the Wellingtons and singing Miss Price's song. Even Miss Price's black puffle joined in, and thats rare!

The fun stopped when a knock at the door was heard. Miss Price looked startled, but glad at the same time.

All of Miss Price's other clothes entered, and started dancing around the room as well!

Miss Price just stared, startled. "Mister Browne, WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?"

"I haven't the foggiest." Browne said. "May I have this dance?" he said to one of the Nightgowns. Miss Price looked at Paul, the youngest chick, and said "Paul, what in the world are you doing?" A sunhat fell on Paul's head and he responded "'Avin a jolly good time, 'ats what!"

"Mister Browne, How will we clean up all this?" Miss Price yelled, trying to navigate her way through a walking closet.

"Didn't I give you my undo-spell? Number eight."

He was tripped by Peter, the oldest chick, who was chasing his trousers.

A floating, single, glove tapped Browne on the shoulder.

"Buzz off! Go find your own dancing nightrobe!" Browne said to the glove. It probobly wasn't the best idea, because the glove punched his hard in the beak. High heeled boots kicked Paul in the face, and Niamh, the sister, was being held down to a cabinet by a blouse. The glove continued to beat up Mister Brown, Niamh ended up on a ceiling fan, Miss Price was scattering around looking for a spell, Peter was being chased by his trousers, and Paul was suffering from a boot on his head.

TO BE CONTINUED