Forum:Governance

Over the months I've been on this database, particularly after the Freezing Snowman Empire was tried out, I came to realize that you can't parody history very easily without parodying an important factor in History: Religion.

Before folks panic and bring up the COC's anti-religion clause, and before people start freaking out, I must explain what I plan to do, how, why, and with what. I am not not writing a religion, but we need something secular (AKA non-religious) to take religion's place. Theology is a very powerful force in the course of history, so it needs something parodic and non-insulting to take its place. That's the challenge.

I don't know how I'm going to convey this, so bear with me.

When we bring up religion, we bring up controversy, so I obviously need the database's support on this. Here we go...

Ever since I joined this database, I've been wanting to run a parody on Roman Catholicism, but not Christianity iteself nor the Church's teachings.

I racked my brain for ages thinging how to parody religion without the religion, and it hit me when I was bathing one night about four or five months ago.

The secret id telecommunications. Think about it.

In the secular world, what is one of the most powerful things humans have created for peaceful use?

Telecommunications. The power grid, phone lines, Ethernet cable, Dial-up, etc. Whoever would control these would be powerful.

In this fictional, neutral Antarctica, where we can't parody religion (no Penguin Jesus, bleh!), there is one thing that comes close to holiness in the debate reigon.

What causes full-scale wars in Dorkugal? Technology. The battle over computers, OS, internet types, etc., it never ends! People take sides and battle forever.

Technology is a powerful force that has shaped history, much like religion (though not as important).

Now, what does telecommunications and Catholicism (not the teachings or the Bible, but the Hiearchy, the leaders, the saints, the terminology) have in common? Absolutely nothing. That's why this would work. We need something powerful with a strong following, one that could date back ages and alter history with its decrees.

Here's my theory. I'll break down everything I seek to parody in this idea. No Jesus/God/Christianity references anywhere.


 * The Pope. Naturally, the Pope is holy and also controversial. He serves as the leader of the real-world Catholicism and is just plain awesome. Addressed as His Holiness.
 * In the parody, he's the leader of all the powerful telecommunications networks. He has the final say on everything involving power lines, phone lines, the Internet itself, upgrades and outages, repairs and service. With a mere signature and royal stamp, the parody could change telecommunications as the fictional world knows it. He dresses as his parody, minus the crosses. No Jesus/God/Christianity references anywhere. Addressed as His Telephonavin (a derivation of the Latin word for "phone", pronounced "Tele-fuh-NAH-ven).
 * Name suggestions needed. I was thinking an acronym, but I need help.


 * Bishops, cardinals, archbishops, priests, ect. In the real world, these are the lower men in the hiearchy, each important but subordinate to each level, ending with the priests (to my knowledge). They teach the Word of God to the masses, the people. Normally addressed as "Father {name}" or "The Holy {name}".
 * The parody is similar. Each one is a lower rank, who carry similar names to their respective parodies. They deliver speeches on how the networks are going, and teach the ways of how to use your phone/wired stuff properly. People gather and listen because technology is interesting. They all dress as their parodies, minus the crosses. No Jesus/God/Christianity references anywhere. Addressed as "Inframolis {name}" or "The Inframolis {name}" (Derived from Latin molis, meaning structure, with the word "Infra" attached).
 * I'm not witty enough to come up with names.


 * The Vatican. In the real world, this is the center of Catholicism, the Pope's residence, and pretty much a very special place. It's where all the major things are done involving Catholicism.
 * In the parody, it's also a massive, ornate complex, performing similar purposes. It's the headquarters of all things wire-based. It looks similar to its parody, though the religious items are replaced with technology stuff such as statues of phones, Internet-ish frescos and paintings, ect. No Jesus/God/Christianity references anywhere.
 * I've got nothing, but I'm thinking "Centriepistula", Latin for "Center of communications" or "center dispatch".


 * Mass. In the real world, it's the time of worship. They come, listen to the preacher/priest/bishop, whoever it may be, and worship Jesus together.
 * In the parody, they come and listen to what the leaders have to say about phones and technology, ect. No Jesus/God/Christianity references anywhere.
 * Tech Time, something like that. I'll take anything.


 * Cathedrals. In the real-world, they are incredible, ornate buildings both in and out. Jesus appears all over the place.
 * In the parody, cathedrals are equally ornate, but serve as customer support, repair centers, meeting places, ect. They also house the technology that runs the power grid, the phones, ect. There's three in every USA state, so I've planned. No Jesus/God/Christianity references anywhere.
 * Cathedrals, probably. Maybe Telenacles (Telephone and Tabernacle). I'm terrible at puns.


 * Sainthood/Canonization. You'd have to ask someone who actually knows about Catholicism for a proper description.
 * In the parody, the "saints" are people whpo made great contributions to the power grids, telephones, ect.
 * Titles are bestowed such as the "Most Awesome" instead of "Blessed", "The PWNsome" instead of "Venerable", ect.

I have more, but I must leave. This isn't religious, just parodic, not intended to be insulting IN ANY WAY.

Discuss on the talk page until I'm back.

-- † कछुए मशरूम! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! †    :)  :) DON'T YOU DARE QUIT BECAUSE OF WHAT I JUST TYPED!!!!!!!! † 23:03, 9 June 2009 (UTC)

There is NO OFFENSE INTENDED. I'm Christian too, so why would I insult other Christians?